For every person you ask, you’ll most likely get a different answer. And even though the World Health Organization (WHO) and the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommend nothing but breastmilk or formula for your baby’s first six months, many pediatricians still suggest starting solids between four and six months of age. And it is not unheard of for some parents to start earlier, or forgo solid foods entirely for the first year.

Just as personal a decision as whether or not to breastfeed, many new parents struggle with the decision to introduce solids to their baby’s diet. Your neighbor started adding cereal to the bottle at two months—should you? Your sister-in-law watched the calendar and sat her baby down for solids at exactly six months—should you? With all the debate, how do you know when the right time actually is for your child?

Why the age range?

According to the AAP, most babies do not have enough control of their tongue and muscles until about four to six months of age. Mastering the ability to accept a spoon and swallow food cannot happen until after a baby has lost the tongue-thrust reflex, that protects babies from choking on foreign objects. Other developmental milestones that generally occur around this time include:

• The ability to sit up well when supported. According to an article on Babycenter, babies don’t need to be high chair ready, but they do need to be able to sit up without support to swallow their food.
• Many doctors say that your baby doubling his or her birth weight is a sign of readiness for solids. Keep in mind, however, that the child should also at least be four months of age.
• Is your baby interested in what you are eating? Trying to reach for your plate at dinner time? If so, this is a good sign that it might be time to introduce solids.

Why should you wait?

Even though your doctor might have recommended trying some rice cereal at four months, there is plenty of data out there to support the decision to wait until at least six months, if not longer. Information available on KellyMom, a website supporting parenting and breastfeeding, cites the WHO among its sources for delaying the introduction of solids for the following reasons:

• Delaying solids will give your baby’s digestive system more time to mature.
• The longer you wait also can help protect your baby from developing food allergies. In fact, if you have a family history of food allergies, it may be recommended by your own doctor to delay solids, no matter how many signs of readiness your baby may be displaying.
• According to one study, waiting can also help protect your child from obesity.
• For breastfeeding moms, the delay of solids also can be a benefit to milk supply. Breastfeeding is supply and demand, after all. Without solids to help fill your baby’s tummy, there will be plenty of demand to keep up your milk supply.

Parents should also know that while the WHO recommends waiting until six months of age to introduce solids, the organization also has found evidence to suggest that exclusive breastfeeding beyond six months may not provide adequate nutrition for growing babies.

What foods should I start with?

Once you have made the decision to go forward, it is important to start slowly to give your baby time to adjust, and to monitor for allergic reactions. It is also recommended to wait three to five days (parents with a family history of allergic disease should wait one week) between foods when introducing something new to allow parents to ferret out the cause of any reactions. Many health care providers recommend starting with rice cereal, as it is gluten-free and less allergenic than other cereals, such as oatmeal and barley.

What you start your baby with has as much to do with your culture as it does with your doctor’s recommendations. Many babies in other countries, such as Africa, can boast meat as their first food. In the United States, it is more common for meat to be introduced later, between six and eight months, even though meat is a better source of iron than cereal.

I personally started Eliana on a few spoonfuls or rice cereal, but soon moved to pureed sweet potato. She is now enjoying the equivalent of one jar of commercial baby food each day.

More information on baby food menus can be found at Wholesome Baby Food. No matter what food you decide to start with, be sure that formula or breastmilk is still your baby’s primary source of nutrients. I like to think of the little spoonfuls of green beans and pear as being a little “perk” to spice up Eliana’s diet.

Foods to avoid

The following foods are more likely to be allergenic, so it is best to avoid these foods until your baby is at least one year of age or until your health care provider recommends that they be introduced:

• Peanut Butter
• Eggs
• Peanuts
• Fish and shellfish
• Cow’s milk
• Citrus fruits and juices
• Gluten-containing foods

What is right for you?

As a parent of a new baby, I can personally testify to the difficulty in following my own beliefs and instincts concerning when to introduce solids to my child. When I was pregnant, I vowed to wait until at least six months. But relatives jokingly commented that I was starving the baby when she reached about four months and began showing great interest in what Mommy, and everybody else, was eating.

While I remained steadfast in my refusal to add rice cereal to my baby’s bottle, I eventually relented on trying out soft foods with a spoon. After all, Eliana had doubled her birth weight, had been able to hold her head up well for quite a while already, and no longer had the tongue-thrust reflex. She also was able to sit well without support, and if I had any doubts left at all, she also opened her mouth wide for me and giggled with the very first bite of homemade rice cereal.

My neighbor, on the other hand, has a baby one week older than Eliana. And while Heidi tried some cereal with Gretchen at the early side of the appropriate age range, Gretchen wanted nothing to do with it. Now about five-and-a-half months, Gretchen smiles and eagerly awaits the next spoonful.

The key is to remember that the information presented in this post, and in every piece of scientific data available, are all guidelines. Unless advised by your health care provider to alter the feeding timeline, there are no rules that have been set in stone. And just as you have made your own decisions on how to birth your child and whether to breast or formula feed, when to introduce solids is uniquely your decision.

Be patient in the beginning. It can take up to fifteen tries before some new foods are accepted. And as with all other guidelines, pay more attention to your baby’s cues when it comes to signs of readiness and signs of fullness than to the guidelines themselves. According to the chart my pediatrician gave me, Eliana could be eating up to two jars of baby food per day right now. Instead of trying to get her to eat more, I stop when she turns her head away or blocks the spoon with her hand. (Smart baby!)

It is also very important to remember that every baby is different and will be ready for solid food in their own time. If you are confident that the time is now, then you are probably right.