Katie Powers is a wife, mother, nurse, lactation consultant, and friend. She writes a column titled, Baby Talk in which she responds to questions from expectant and new parents. Katie was kind enough to allow me to share one of her recent columns.

Becoming a Great Father by Katie Powers

Question: We are expecting our first child soon. I want to be a great father. Do you have any suggestions?

Answer: First of all have patience with yourself, your wife, and your baby. Having a baby is not just an event, it is the beginning of a process. That process is how you develop into a father. Learning about fathering takes time, energy, interest, and commitment.

Attending prenatal classes with your wife during the pregnancy will help you prepare for the early weeks of fathering. The classes are not just about becoming a mother, but they are also about what the responsibilities of a father entail. You will learn many things that will help you through those first few weeks of chaos—the infamous postpartum period.

The role of a father is a forever role. Together you and your wife will find the strength to deal with the short periods of sleep, the constant changing of diapers, and the recollections of what your life was like before your baby was born. Even with the stressors of early parenting, you carry on and cannot imagine life without your precious baby.

You will have already learned about fathering from your own father. If your father was not involved in your life, hopefully you had a father figure. Whomever it was, they taught you how to stand by your own principles and be strong in the face of adversity.

When my children reflected on their father who died recently, they wrote: “He was always wise and had an informed opinion on the issues facing us locally, nationally, and globally. He was our disciplinarian, our mentor, and our teacher. He taught us so much. He strictly adhered to his set of principles and beliefs, which could not be altered by any passing craze. He used to say he chose not to participate in popular culture.” A true testament to a great father.

Try to remember these 10 things on your journey to becoming a great father:

1. Love your child’s mother.

2. Spend time with your child.

3. Talk to your child.

4. Discipline with a gentle spirit.

5. Be a role model to your child and to other fathers.

6. Be a teacher to your child.

7. Eat together as a family.

8. Read to your child.

9. Show affection.

10. Realize that a father’s job is never done.